One way to address the wedding/reception locale struggle is to have a party/reception in addition to the wedding reception. It allows you to cull the actual wedding reception's guest list because you can invite business associates, coworkers, neighbors etc. to those parties and keep the wedding to just the good friends/relatives of the bride/groom.
When my parents got married (they were from different states, met in college, and then lived in another state) they had a reception/party in Dad's hometown, Mom's hometown, and the wedding in their new hometown.
As far as doing what you want, one friend decided her wedding was actually going to have good food and a tasty dessert. Not only was it the only wedding I have gone to where the food was all good, they served the best tiramisu ever (and to back up their claim I have personally tested over 150 recipes on 2 continents) instead of an overpriced and blah wedding cake.